9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
