The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
