he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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