watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Cover your peen. We're going out.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize