I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize