He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
