Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Randomize
