i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
