No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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