awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
