I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
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No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
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I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
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