To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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