If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Randomize
