How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
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