just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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