Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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