im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
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