Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize