I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
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