youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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