i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
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