And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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