hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
In America we eat man semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
you made out with another girl for some wings
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
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