you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
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i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
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I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize