I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize