I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
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