So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
