Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
you never un-have a 4some
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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