Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
