why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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