In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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