Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
