Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird