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• (301): View more from Maryland

  She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.

  (301): View more from Maryland

  but she's really nice

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  You can't special order awesome

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.

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• (915): View more from Texas

  You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.

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  27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex

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• (585): View more from New York

  she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over

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• (585): View more from New York

  You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.

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  23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (270): View more from Kentucky

  I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed

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• (360): View more from Washington

  first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.

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