Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize