I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
last night I used snow as a chaser
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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