Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
