I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
