Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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