I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
