Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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