just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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