I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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