The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize