I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
