Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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