Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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