We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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