We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize