do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
