Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
