i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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