I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
sex in a hospital.. check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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